Friday, January 29, 2016

Æther Salon: Publishing! (Edited Transcript)

Aether Salon: Publishing!

Welcome, word wranglers! If you’re here, odds are that you’ve written a story, or are thinking about writing one, or you really like to read published stories.

Even if you are not writing a book, knowing how it all works will give you a deeper understanding of what your favorite authors have gone through to bring their stories to life. No matter how books get published, they are nothing without their readers.

The process of getting your book into the hands of your readers can be confusing, I know. The purpose of my talk today is to try to remove as much of the confusion as possible and leave you with practical facts you can use as you make a publishing decision that’s right for you.

There’s various roads leading to towards publication. Once upon a time, your choices were limited. Happily, we now live in interesting times where the lack of an agent or baskets of money are no longer a hurdle. The traditional methods of publishing still exist, and rumor has it they may even be thriving, but more than ever, your writing career can remain within your control.

And remember, your path can change - you might start off self publishing and later find an opportunity to go the traditional agent/publisher route… or you might leave tradition behind and embrace self-publishing. Or mix and match, if you write in multiple genres.

So, with a tip of our hat to those early writers who pressed sticks into clay tablets and laid reed pens against papyrus—and Johannes Gutenberg and his little invention—let’s demystify the publishing process so you can make intelligent decisions about the road you and your book will travel.


VANITY PRESS


In a nutshell, if a publisher requires your money up-front in order to publish your book, you’re dealing with a Vanity Press.

I’ll admit I’m biased here. Years ago, I made inquiries of a publisher who I did not know was a vanity press at the time. I learned the hard way that these places specialize in catering to your ego as your ‘personal representative’ excitedly promises you the moon and the stars… for a hefty price. If your book is not yet complete, you’ll be pressured to commit to a deadline for production, since clearly your premise is the most astonishing one they’ve heard in years and they are very anxious to get it printed. The talk will quickly turn to how fast you’ll be able to raise the funds needed to print your book. You’ll have to work hard to get loose from their clutches if you decide to back out. I backed out pretty quickly, and not a dime was lost, but the fact that these presses still exist means a lot of money is being handed over. Who says you can’t buy a dream?

In the interest of balance, though, I will cite a couple of examples of authors who found success after starting off with a vanity publication.


In 1811, Jane Austen paid a publisher to publish Sense and Sensibility, which qualifies the book to be a vanity press publication. While her books were (and still are) insanely popular, she never received accolades as a writer, since she originally penned her stories under the anonymous name of “By A Lady”.

(Note on the slide, at the bottom, it says "Printed For The Author")

“Perhaps I am as thick as two short planks, but I cannot understand how a man can take thirty pages to describe how he turns round in his bed before he finally falls asleep.” This publisher’s rejection letter probably gave Marcel Proust some sleepless nights, but he shook it off and in 1913 paid a French publisher to print Du Côté de Chez Swann (Swann’s Way), which eventually became the first volume in his ‘novel in seven books’, À la Recherche du Temps Perdu (Remembrance of Things Past).

A side note - beware of literary agents who charge ‘reading fees’ in order to consider taking you on. Just as in other areas of life, if something seems too good to be true (and asks for cash up front), it probably is.

SMALL PRESS

A press that makes less annually than $50 million net (this is the United States threshold, other countries may vary) is classified as a Small Press. Most of these produce just a few books a year, about ten or so. They’re often called Indie Presses too, not to be confused with an Indie Author.


Virginia Woolf and husband Leonard Woolf, started Hogarth Press in 1917, for the purpose of publishing her own books and those of other selected authors. This is a very early, and possibly the first example of a small press. Many others have come and gone through the years since then. Author Dave Eggers founded McSweeney’s. Authors Kelly Link and Gavin Grant founded Small Beer Press.

Jimmy Branagh: Arkham House was small press. Look what they did for Lovecraft and others.


Not far from Ceejay’s typist, Sleeping Bear Press published its first book in 1998, called… wait for it… The Legend of Sleeping Bear. It’s a beautifully illustrated book that a local Michigan legend and turns it into a children’s story. The book is now the Official Children’s Book of Michigan. Yes, that’s a real thing. Sleeping Bear Press, based in Ann Arbor Michigan, continues to publish illustrated children’s picture books.


If your passion and genre happens to be a perfect match for a small press, you could find yourself in luck, just as Jeannine Hall Gailey did with her book of poetry inspired by her childhood in Oak Ridge, Tennessee, growing up in the shadow of the Manhattan Project. Her surreal poetry is set in a world overwhelmed by radioactivity, science, and the atomic bomb. While powerful stuff, her 80 pages of mindwarping poetry are not what the large publishers are looking for.

However, Mayapple Press, founded in 1978 by poet and editor Judith Kerman, proved to be Jeannine’s perfect match. Mayapple seeks out “...literature that is both challenging and accessible: poetry that transcends the categories of "mainstream" and "avant-garde"; women's writing; the Great Lakes/Northeastern culture; the recent immigrant experience; poetry in translation; science fiction poetry.”

If your niche doesn’t seem to be the big publishers cuppa tea, consider seeking out small presses more in tune with your style.

TRADITIONAL PUBLISHING


Traditional publishing is a threesome. An author hooks up with an agent who works to get a contract with a publisher. Once this happens, all sorts of good things can happen to an author and their book.

Your book will be professionally edited, cover art will be designed to suit your story, and your book will be marketed out to bookstores. Your agent will have negotiated the best possible contract for you, and will be keeping an eye on the various legalities during the production and promotion process. For a percentage, of course. Ah, and by the way, your own earned royalties will probably amount to 8% to 10% of the sale price of the book.

On the down side, you’ll not have much say in the process. What your book looks like, where it’s sold, and how it’s advertised are out of your hands. What started out as ‘your baby’ is now a project in the hands of a team that’s been formed for the sole purpose of making some money off your book.

Sheryl Skytower: Physical book. Usually much higher royalty for the ebooks. :)


SELF PUBLISHING

And last but not least, there’s self-publishing. I’ll talk a lot more about this option because it’s the one that requires the most from you, and I want you to fully grasp the scope of work you’ll be taking on yourself as an Independent Writer.

Remember, the ‘self’ in Self Publishing is You. You’re the author. You’re in charge of getting the manuscript edited and proofed. You need to either make or hire an artist for cover art. Advertising, accounting and promoting? Tag, you’re it!


If you think self-publishing began with the arrival of the internet, think again. In the mid 1700s, Benjamin Franklin wrote and self-published Poor Richard’s Almanack. A quote from that publication, “If you would not be forgotten, as soon as you are dead and rotten, either write things worth reading, or do things worth writing.”

If you look at the image being displayed of Ben’s almanack, you can see at the very bottom, “Printed and fold by B FRANKLIN, at the New Printing-Office near the Market.”


In the late 1700s and early 1800s, the English poet William Blake not only wrote and self-published his own works, but created all the illustrations and etched them onto copper plates. After printing his works, he hand-colored the etchings.

Walt Whitman self-published the first edition of Leaves of Grass in 1855. He had 795 copies printed, and worked on binding them whenever he had the funds to pay for supplies.


Now we will run further up the self-publishing timeline. Lightning Source was formed in 1997. They are still one of the leading print on demand publishers. Print On Demand (POD) is insanely practical. There’s no excess stock to deal with, no storage issues, no out of date books leftover if a second edition is printed, and the cost is reasonable. The print on demand concept caught on quickly, and soon iUniverse, CreateSpace (Amazon’s print division) and Lulu were offering their services to Indie authors.


There’s a learning curve with POD, just as there is with every aspect of Indie publishing, but once you’ve got it figure out, I think you’ll love it. The image showing now is my own book cover, showing the front, spine and back, all of which was converted to a PDF file before uploading to CreateSpace.

After the first upload, I ordered a copy of the book to be sent to me. I checked it over and realized the spine was too narrow - parts of the front and back cover were folding over to the spine. Adjustments were made, a new PDF was uploaded, and I was much happier with the tweaks. Now, whenever a paperback copy is ordered, it’s printed and sent out, so quickly that readers usually have no clue that the book they hold in their hand didn’t exist until they placed their order.


Some of you may already be published writers and not even realize it. Journaling and Blogging are Indie Writing! They can be satisfying on their own merit, or start a writer on a path to publication.

Around 1999, we started hearing a weird word being bandied about. ‘Bloggers’ were using various easy-to-set-up websites to share serial novels, fanfiction, and promote their own works. LiveJournal was cutting-edge back then, and helped give rise to writers like Cassie Claire, who wrote Harry Potter and Lord of The Rings fanfic in her younger days. (I admit I LOVED her Very Secret Diaries, and still occasionally mutter, ‘Cannot cope, off to Mordor’.) She’s since gone on to publish YA books through Simon & Schuster and Scholastic, and reportedly makes absurd bushel baskets of money these days.


In 2002, Julie Powell’s The Julie/Julia Project blog, which was a chronicle of her attempt to prepare every dish in Julia Child’s Mastering the Art of French Cooking, eventually led to the the publishing of the book Julie and Julia: 365 Days, 524 Recipes, 1 Tiny Apartment Kitchen AND the 2009 movie Julie & Julia. Which was great. Find it and watch it.

By 2008, IndieGoGo, Kickstarter, and RocketHub appeared on the web, giving authors another resource to help with the expenses of self-publishing a book. A heads-up for you—on February 29, 2016, Publaunch.com will start offering crowdfunding events specifically for books and publishing services.

So, all that being said… what exactly are the tasks you’ll need to take care of as an Independent Author? Let’s find out.

SELF-PUBLISHED WRITER’S CHECKLIST


Toss your pride aside and get a critique of your final draft. Round up a few Beta Readers and take their comments to heart.

After you’ve tweaked the needfuls recommended by the Beta Readers… secure an editor to give your work that final polish before publishing. Don’t be so presumptuous as to think ‘I’ve read it a dozen times, I am positive it is perfect.’ Trust me, it’s not. You are too close to the work, and that makes you blind to the flaws. If you cannot afford an editor, who will point out plot flaws, rearrange your badly worded sentences and fix all your punctuation as well as letting you know where your book bogs down and where it’s awesome, at the very least, hire a proofreader to kill all the punctuation mistakes, synonym misfires, and shrapnel.

What is shrapnel? Shrapnel happens when you re-write a sentence over and over, and in the end forget to remove some of the leftover words. I edited Pip Ballantine’s Weather Child. It’s a magnificent book, and I highly recommend it! Especially after I carted out at least three trailer loads of shrapnel. :) We are all prone to producing it, and you would be amazed at how much if it you can go blind to as the author.


Start building your platforms. Make a website. Create Facebook and Twitter pages. Set up a GoodReads account. And that’s the bare minimum. Don’t wait till you’re published to get this all settled. Do it in advance so when your head is spinning at LEAST you have these things in place.

Back to Beta Reading. Give copies of your manuscript to some readers who will give you feedback, and if you are very lucky and the gods of the quills are smiling upon you, they will respond with some quotable phrases you can use in promotion, or even on your back cover!

Choose your publishing service. Are you going to go paperback or digital or both? Every service has its own formatting and cover art requirements. It’s good to know what they are so you can get the info to your artist, if you’ve hired one.

Or… choose your publishing services, plural. You CAN publish at Amazon and elsewhere too, but you’ll need to carefully choose the right answers when you set up your agreement with Amazon. If you are willing to take 35% in royalties, you are free to publish anywhere else you like. If you want Amazon’s tempting 70% royalties, you will give up your rights to publish elsewhere.

Ceejay Writer: (Sheryl, it's 35% at Amazon now, right? )
Sheryl Skytower: I believe so....
Maxwell Grantly: Royalities at Amazon depend on what price you sell your ebook for.
Ceejay Writer: Those percentages are for Kindle eBooks.

Choose wisely, and take all the time you need to read everyone’s contracts and rules. Don’t rush this step. Learn everything you need to know.

Hire an artist or dig in yourself to create your cover art. Browse bookstores with an eye to everyone else’s cover art. See what works for you and what doesn’t. This will help you finalize your vision for your cover art. Read the requirements your chosen publisher has provided to be sure about the requirements for the final art upload.

Daniel Rothchen: Many suggest spending most of your money on getting a good editor before publishing on Amazon and its ilk .. would you agree?
Ceejay Writer: My opinion - put the money into editing and cover art.

Upload your manuscript. Then proof the output. Every page. If you have chosen to use multiple distribution points, you’ll need to do this step for each version; Kindle, Nook, Paperback, PDF… one might be perfect, but another format might need help.

BLURBIE TIME. This may be the toughest step yet, other than actually writing the book. For marketing purposes, you will need some promotional wording. Craft some short tagline sentences, two long synopsis (one with spoilers and one without), a short synopsis, something that fits Twitter’s limitations, and any other snappy bits you can think of to help keep interest high in social media. Save these all in one document for on the fly cutting and pasting.

Steadman Kondor: big publishers are starting to skimp on their cover art now, unfortunately. comfirmed by mates in the industry...
Ceejay Writer: Indie authors should take note of that! There's an area to outdo the big guys.
Satu Moreau: A bad cover too can repel instead of attract a reader.
Steadman Kondor: yes!
Ceejay Writer: I admit to buying some books based on cover art.
Maxwell Grantly: never judge a book based on its cover - but we do!

Have a high res author photo and a written bio ready for the world to see. Scary. I set up a Media Kit page at my website and shoved these things in there for easy access.

Start thinking about advertising. Will you have book giveaway contests? Will you pay for ads on Facebook and other sites? Will you find blogs to be a guest writer on, will you try to get interviewed, will you haul boxes of your book to signings, will you sign up as an author at conventions?


Reviews: You’re probably going to have to beg for them, dangle free review copies in front of people’s faces, beg some more, and never stop groveling. Amazon’s cracked down hard on who can post reviews, and will slap your hand if they think you book has been loaded up with reviews from family and friends. It’s frustrating. And you NEED reviews. Within the online eBook seller websites, those reviews are what push your book up from the basement to where readers can actually find it on their own. When the reviews taper off, your book sinks again.

Those of you who read (I hope that’s everyone!): When an author encourages you to review their book, they are really hoping you will. Post an honest review. It doesn’t have to be long. A sentence or two will do. And repost it at GoodReads, even if you don’t like the place much. :) It’s got some clout. You will have done something very important for that book, and it’s writer.

As an Indie Writer, you are responsible for all aspects of your book. You’ll find allies and help along the way, but not if you don’t seek them out, and pay them when appropriate. At the end of the day, it’s all on you. But on the flip side anything fantastic that comes of this publishing adventure is all yours, too. :) It can be incredibly satisfying.

And finally, the last step. Sit back, relax, try not to yell at the inevitable crappy reviews, and get used to the notion that you are a published author. And then get started on your next book.



Darlingmonster Ember: !think a book ahead if you can!
Sheryl Skytower: Think three!
Ceejay Writer: And that's my advice! I know we have other authors in this room and I value their experiences and opinions too. Feel free to make yourself known if you wish to let others ask you questions later, too.

Daniel Rothchen: On DeviantArt, I understand there are alot fine graphic artists that can be hired for your cover art. They are not big time but yet professional freelancers.
Ceejay Writer: DeviantArt has WONDERFUL artists. Just get one with a decent attention span!

Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Fraulein Ceejay, if your fellow authors here - Nika, Fraulein Skytower and anyone else - could list their books' titles and where to find them, they will be in the transcript.
Sheryl Skytower: If anyone wants info on the romance writing industry, please feel free to drop me a pm and I'll help if I can.
Sheryl Skytower: I have... 13 books presently out with four this year. I am agented and can be found at www.sherylnantus.com. :)
Sheryl Skytower: I've had experience with small publishers (Samhain, Carina Press) and right now have contracts with St. Martin's Press and Entangled for romance. :) http://www.amazon.com/Sheryl-Nantus/e/B002BM60WW

Fauve Aeon: I have articles in here http://www.amazon.com/Horror-Addicts-Guide-Life-Emerian/dp/1508772525

Ceejay Writer: Here, include this page in the salon transcript. http://www.brassbrightcity.com/2015/06/10/the-literary-world-of-new-babbage/

Nika Thought-werk: Sure ... presently, my first book may be found here ... and I am working on the second and the third ...http://www.amazon.com/Do-Clockworks-Dream-Gear-Toothed-Sheep-ebook/dp/B014EEOELI/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1452927137&sr=8-1

Mosseveno Tenk: if you're more a short story person, check this out: http://thegrinder.diabolicalplots.com/
Magda Kamenev: Hmm. There is also a submissions tracker and announcement board for short stories and poetry - Duotrope - but it is a subscription service.
Magda Kamenev: https://duotrope.com/
Mosseveno Tenk: The Grinder was inspired by Duotrope's subscription prices. It's the free version.

Sheryl Skytower: If you're looking for a good writing forum for all genres and self-pubbing, may I suggest Absolute Write? www.absolutewrite.com/forums/
Sheryl Skytower: Absolute Write can also help you avoid the scammers and shady publishers - highly recommend going there, you can lurk and relax as you read.

Nathan Adored: hmmmmm.... did workshop groups get mentioned today, too? If so, I blinked and missed it. That is, the idea of joining a group of fellow struggling writers to help each other get better at it.
Steadman Kondor: for writing groups you need a strong and kind convenor.
Darlingmonster Ember: There are some good workshop groups online, but be choosy.
Steadman Kondor: ...or you get ripped to shreds ... or the opposite - you only get claps and praises:)
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: I seem to remember there's a professional fellow who has writing resources here on the grid.
Ceejay Writer: Michael Stackpole.

Ceejay Writer: If anyone has questions later, I'm an open book. *laughs* ceejay.writer@gmail.com
Sheryl Skytower: I'm open for emails as well at sherylnantus@gmail.com - I only know about romance writing, so... :)

Æther Salon: Publishing! (Cleaned-up Otherwise-unedited Transcript)

[14:04:06] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach makes a note that New Babbage time is five minutes late.
[14:04:24] Elleon Bergamasco: at least...
[14:04:28] Ceejay Writer: Takes twice as long for a Babbager to scrub their face for a fancy event.
[14:04:34] Darlingmonster Ember: sounds like they need a clockwinder?
[14:04:36] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Heh.
[14:04:37] Blossom Love: Hi Wright!
[14:04:40] Satu Moreau: Hah
[14:04:43] Wildstar Beaumont: NBST
[14:04:44] Sheryl Skytower: Is it the right day?
[14:04:55] Jedburgh Dagger: or a bigger clock. Or maybe we're all ignoring it.
[14:05:00] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: All right, while we await latecomers, let me thank you all for coming, and issue a few 'housekeeping' points of order.
[14:05:04] Blossom Love: Hi Satu and Nathan!
[14:05:06] Ceejay Writer: I'm ready whenever everyone else is!
[14:05:22] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: 1) To ensure you can hear the speaker, stand or sit on the patterned carpet.
[14:05:27] Elleon Bergamasco pulls out her notepad and licks her pencil
[14:05:47] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: 2) If you do not have a wearable chair and wish one, please contact me in IM.
[14:06:11] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: 3) Please remove all lag-feeding thingamajigs you might be wearing.
[14:06:20] Blossom Love: Hi Bixyl!
[14:06:27] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: 4) A tip jar is out for our speaker. Do please show your appreciation!
[14:06:30] Blossom Love: Hi Idris!
[14:06:36] Dr. Henry Jekyll: Hello, hello.
[14:06:39] Blossom Love: Hi Wulfriðe!
[14:06:41] Bixyl Shuftan: Hello Blossom
[14:06:48] Idris Darwinian: hello
[14:06:55] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Robotnika Resident!
[14:07:02] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: 5) Any tips to help support the establishment will also be welcome - just click on one of the support signs or this handsome clank floating above us. We are in particular need this month, if your generosity is possible.
[14:07:16] Solace Fairlady: Hello Miss Myrtil:)
[14:07:22] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Fauve Aeon!
[14:07:28] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: 6) If you are not a member of the AEther Salon group, there are signs that will let you join up. You'll be most heartily welcome.
[14:07:30] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Darlingmonster Ember!
[14:07:32] Myrtil Igaly waves to everyone and apologizes for any unmeant rudeness due to internet problems
[14:07:33] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Sheryl Skytower!
[14:07:42] Dr. Henry Jekyll: Hello everyone!
[14:07:42] Ceejay Writer: Sixty Eighth salon! Support this historic venue!
[14:07:47] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: 7) Edited and unedited transcripts of these proceedings will be posted at aethersalon.blogspot.com.
[14:08:01] Erin Brennan: Hello everyone!
[14:08:03] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Magdalena Kamenev!
[14:08:04] Blossom Love: Hi Count!
[14:08:07] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Satu Moreau!
[14:08:12] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: And lastly:
[14:08:21] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: 8) Tea and treats are set out - help yourself! Fraulein Skytower is guarding the cookies, though.
[14:08:22] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Solace Fairlady!
[14:08:31] Satu Moreau: Hehe
[14:08:33] Jimmy Branagh waves to Miss Erin
[14:08:46] Jimmy Branagh: Hoy Count!
[14:08:54] Sheryl Skytower: I'z is in charge of quality control. *waves one in air*
[14:09:04] Solace Fairlady waves to Satu, and to Misses Dee and Jed
[14:09:07] Dr. Henry Jekyll: Did everyone just come in right before Ceejay began to speak?
[14:09:14] Sheryl Skytower: Iz important work! *nibbles*
[14:09:16] Blossom Love: Hi Vernden!
[14:09:18] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: They did.
[14:09:21] Blossom Love: Hi Emerson!
[14:09:28] Blossom Love: Hi Rufus!
[14:09:29] Ceejay Writer: Everyone is uncanny that way.
[14:09:34] Blossom Love: Hi Lia!
[14:09:35] Solace Fairlady: and to both the Admirals:)
[14:09:49] Lia Venuto: =)
[14:10:04] Steadman Kondor: oh miss peaches :) waves
[14:10:09] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: I need not introduce one of the most beloved citizens of the Steamlands as a whole, so I shall merely give over to Fraulein Writer to make the most of this time.
[14:10:13] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach applauds
[14:10:16] Peaches Latrell Kronos waves
[14:10:20] Darlingmonster Ember applauds
[14:10:22] Magda Kamenev claps.
[14:10:23] Bookworm Hienrichs applauds.
[14:10:23] Wulfriðe Blitzen applauds
[14:10:23] Ceejay Writer: Oh good gosh. *blushes*
[14:10:24] Solace Fairlady applauds
[14:10:25] Jimmy Branagh applauds
[14:10:26] Satu Moreau: :)
[14:10:27] Darlingmonster Ember applauds
[14:10:29] Maxwell Grantly claps
[14:10:29] Dr. Henry Jekyll applauds.
[14:10:31] Sera Puchkina applauds
[14:10:33] Steadman Kondor claps
[14:10:34] Bixyl Shuftan claps
[14:10:38] Maxwell Grantly: ஜॐ♥ஜ______ஜॐ♥ஜ
[14:10:38] Maxwell Grantly: APPLAUSE!!!
[14:10:38] Maxwell Grantly: APPLAUSE!!!
[14:10:38] Maxwell Grantly: APPLAUSE!!!
[14:10:38] Maxwell Grantly: ஜॐ♥ஜ______ஜॐ♥ஜ
[14:10:38] Erin Brennan claps politely
[14:10:38] Nika Thought-werk applauds happily.
[14:10:41] Ceejay Writer: Okay, here we go!
[14:10:44] Count Bologna politely claps
[14:10:46] Ceejay Writer: Welcome, word wranglers! If you’re here, odds are that you’ve written a story, or are thinking about writing one, or you really like to read published stories.
[14:11:01] Blossom Love: Hi Sella! Hi Tenk!
[14:11:03] Ceejay Writer: Even if you are not writing a book, knowing how it all works will give you a deeper understanding of what your favorite authors have gone through to bring their stories to life. No matter how books get published, they are nothing without their readers.
[14:11:27] Ceejay Writer: The process of getting your book into the hands of your readers can be confusing, I know. The purpose of my talk today is to try to remove as much of the confusion as possible and leave you with practical facts you can use as you make a publishing decision that’s right for you.
[14:12:08] Ceejay Writer: There’s various roads leading to towards publication. Once upon a time, your choices were limited. Happily, we now live in interesting times where the lack of an agent or baskets of money are no longer a hurdle. The traditional methods of publishing still exist, and rumor has it they may even be thriving, but more than ever, your writing career can remain within your control.
[14:12:14] Blossom Love: Hi Stereo!
[14:12:19] Blossom Love: Hi Dee!
[14:12:24] Lady Sumoku struggles valiantly to rerez everything a second time.
[14:12:38] Stereo Nacht waves quiestly so not to disturb too much
[14:12:48] Ceejay Writer: And remember, your path can change - you might start off self publishing and later find an opportunity to go the traditional agent/publisher route… or you might leave tradition behind and embrace self-publishing. Or mix and match, if you write in multiple genres.
[14:13:03] Solace Fairlady waves to Capt Stereo:)
[14:13:20] Ceejay Writer: So, with a tip of our hat to those early writers who pressed sticks into clay tablets and laid reed pens against papyrus—and Johannes Gutenberg and his little invention—let’s demystify the publishing process so you can make intelligent decisions about the road you and your book will travel.
[14:13:58] Ceejay Writer: Our first type of publishing.... is the Vanity Press.
[14:14:09] Ceejay Writer: In a nutshell, if a publisher requires your money up-front in order to publish your book, you’re dealing with a Vanity Press.
[14:14:14] Blossom Love: Hi Peaches!
[14:14:38] Ceejay Writer: I’ll admit I’m biased here. Years ago, I made inquiries of a publisher who I did not know was a vanity press at the time. I learned the hard way that these places specialize in catering to your ego as your ‘personal representative’ excitedly promises you the moon and the stars… for a hefty price. If your book is not yet complete, you’ll be pressured to commit to a deadline for production, since clearly your premise is the most astonishing one they’ve heard in years and they are very anxious to get it printed.
[14:14:58] Bookworm Hienrichs chuckles at the picture.
[14:15:00] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Isobel DeSantis!
[14:15:07] Nika Thought-werk blinks.
[14:15:07] Sheryl Skytower nods
[14:15:07] Darlingmonster Ember: ohmy
[14:15:08] Jimmy Branagh: Boo Vanity publishers!
[14:15:11] Ceejay Writer: The talk will quickly turn to how fast you’ll be able to raise the funds needed to print your book. You’ll have to work hard to get loose from their clutches if you decide to back out. I backed out pretty quickly, and not a dime was lost, but the fact that these presses still exist means a lot of money is being handed over. Who says you can’t buy a dream?
[14:15:15] Dr. Henry Jekyll groans.
[14:15:44] Nathan Adored: Yeah, anything that wants money up front like that.... run away from it.
[14:15:45] Lady Sumoku: Or a nightmare
[14:15:52] Ceejay Writer: In the interest of balance, though, I will cite a couple of examples of authors who found success after starting off with a vanity publication.
[14:16:10] Ceejay Writer: In 1811, Jane Austen paid a publisher to publish Sense and Sensibility. which qualifies the book to be a vanity press publication. While her books were (and still are) insanely popular, she never received accolades as a writer, since she originally penned her stories under the anonymous name of “By A Lady”.
[14:16:43] Ceejay Writer: (Note on the slide, at the bottom, it says "Printed For The Author")
[14:16:47] Nika Thought-werk blinks "But, she was a lady."
[14:17:00] Ceejay Writer: *winks at Nika* Indeed.
[14:17:06] Dr. Henry Jekyll: Which lady, though. There are many ladies in the world.
[14:17:13] Nathan Adored gets a goofy, lopsided smile.
[14:17:17] Ceejay Writer: “Perhaps I am as thick as two short planks, but I cannot understand how a man can take thirty pages to describe how he turns round in his bed before he finally falls asleep.” This publisher’s rejection letter probably gave Marcel Proust some sleepless nights, but he shook it off and in 1913 paid a French publisher to print Du Côté de Chez Swann (Swann’s Way), which eventually became the first volume in his ‘novel in seven books’, À la Recherche du Temps Perdu (Remembrance of Things Past).
[14:17:22] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Stereo Nacht!
[14:17:35] Nika Thought-werk looks at Mister Hyde "Oh! Good point."
[14:17:38] Jimmy Branagh chuckles
[14:18:07] Ceejay Writer: A side note - beware of literary agents who charge ‘reading fees’ in order to consider taking you on. Just as in other areas of life, if something seems too good to be true (and asks for cash up front), it probably is.
[14:18:25] Darlingmonster Ember makes furious notes
[14:18:39] Ceejay Writer: And now we move on the the next publishing method -- The Small Press
[14:18:45] Sheryl Skytower: Words of da wisdom...
[14:18:59] Ceejay Writer: A press that makes less annually than $50 million net (this is the United States threshhold, other countries may vary) is classified as a Small Press. Most of these produce just a few books a year, about ten or so. They’re often called Indie Presses too, not to be confused with an Indie Author.
[14:19:29] Jedburgh Dagger: or Indy Jones?
[14:19:45] Ceejay Writer: :D
[14:19:48] Ceejay Writer: Virginia Woolf and husband Leonard Woolf, started Hogarth Press in 1917, for the purpose of publishing her own books and those of other selected authors. This is a very early, and possibly the first example of a small press. Many others have come and gone through the years since then. Author Dave Eggers founded McSweeney’s. Authors Kelly Link and Gavin Grant founded Small Beer Press.
[14:19:52] Lady Sumoku whispers "The torch is going out!"
[14:20:07] Steadman Kondor: mutters... William Blake too
[14:20:24] Ceejay Writer: Wait for it, Steadman..... *wink*
[14:20:30] Jimmy Branagh: Arkham House was small press. Look what they did for Lovecraft and others
[14:20:31] Nathan Adored wonders suddenly if there's an indie press publisher that specialises in indie jones knock offs
[14:20:52] Ceejay Writer: True that, Jimmy!
[14:21:02] Jimmy Branagh nods
[14:21:15] Ceejay Writer: William Blake qualifies for self-publishing, and will be mentioned later in the talk.
[14:21:41] Jimmy Branagh recalls the Red Dragon tattoo on his back ...
[14:21:58] Ceejay Writer: Not far from Ceejay’s typist, Sleeping Bear Press published its first book in 1998, called… wait for it… The Legend of Sleeping Bear. It’s a beautifully illustrated book that a local Michigan legend and turns it into a children’s story. The book is now the Official Children’s Book of Michigan. Yes, that’s a real thing. Sleeping Bear Press, based in Ann Arbor Michigan, continues to publish illustrated children’s picture books.
[14:22:18] Darlingmonster Ember: Nice
[14:22:23] Ceejay Writer: (pardon the squished ness of some of my graphics, my slide projector is rather rigid in its way of thinking)
[14:22:33] Blossom Love: Edward Gorey is my favorite author!
[14:22:55] Ceejay Writer: If your passion and genre happens to be a perfect match for a small press, you could find yourself in luck, just as Jeannine Hall Gailey did with her book of poetry inspired by her childhood in Oak Ridge, Tennessee, growing up in the shadow of the Manhattan Project. Her surreal poetry is set in a world overwhelmed by radioactivity, science, and the atomic bomb. While powerful stuff, her 80 pages of mindwarping poetry are not what the large publishers are looking for.
[14:23:37] Nika Thought-werk frowns and shakes a fist at the large publishers.
[14:23:39] Ceejay Writer: However, Mayapple Press, founded in 1978 by poet and editor Judith Kerman, proved to be Jeannine’s perfect match. Mayapple seeks out “...literature that is both challenging and accessible: poetry that transcends the categories of "mainstream" and "avant-garde"; women's writing; the Great Lakes/Northeastern culture; the recent immigrant experience; poetry in translation; science fiction poetry.”
[14:24:20] Ceejay Writer: If your niche doesn’t seem to be the big publishers cuppa tea, consider seeking out small presses more in tune with your style.
[14:24:25] Stereo Nacht takes a note
[14:25:13] Ceejay Writer: And now we move on to... Traditional Publishing. If all the air soon feels sucked out of the room, Big Publishers took it.
[14:25:26] Bookworm Hienrichs chuckles.
[14:25:33] Darlingmonster Ember searches in her purse for her breather
[14:25:37] Ceejay Writer: Traditional publishing is a threesome. An author hooks up with an agent who works to get a contract with a publisher. Once this happens, all sorts of good things can happen to an author and their book.
[14:25:38] Jimmy Branagh: hehe
[14:25:47] Nika Thought-werk frowns and shakes a fist at the big publishers.
[14:25:52] Count Bologna: "can"
[14:26:04] Sheryl Skytower: *grins* I likes da threesomes!
[14:26:15] Ceejay Writer: I did not say will for a reason! :)
[14:26:26] Bookworm Hienrichs snerks at Sheryl.
[14:26:41] Lady Sumoku: So we have nobody to fire at.
[14:26:50] Ceejay Writer: Your book will be professionally edited, cover art will be designed to suit your story, and your book will be marketed out to bookstores. Your agent will have negotiated the best possible contract for you, and will be keeping an eye on the various legalities during the production and promotion process. For a percentage, of course. Ah, and by the way, your own earned royalties will probably amount to 8% to 10% of the sale price of the book.
[14:27:15] Bookworm Hienrichs: Wow.
[14:27:17] Darlingmonster Ember: (cough)
[14:27:19] Ceejay Writer: On the down side, you’ll not have much say in the process. What your book looks like, where it’s sold, and how it’s advertised are out of your hands. What started out as ‘your baby’ is now a project in the hands of a team that’s been formed for the sole purpose of making some money off your book.
[14:27:20] Sera Puchkina: Yes, wow
[14:27:33] Jimmy Branagh: Ergo, L. Ron Hubbard started a religion ...
[14:27:35] Mosseveno Tenk: but... prestige?
[14:27:40] Sheryl Skytower: *raises paw* physical book. Usually much higher royalty for the ebooks. :)
[14:28:03] Ceejay Writer: If you are into prestige only, you probably already fell into the gaping maw of a Vanity Press. *chuckles*
[14:28:17] Ceejay Writer: Good call, Sheryl. Yes.
[14:28:21] Mosseveno Tenk: so i really look that dumb?
[14:28:31] Dr. Henry Jekyll: Oh, hello Mayor.
[14:28:34] Mosseveno Tenk: don't answer that...
[14:28:34] Ceejay Writer: *no comment*
[14:28:53] Nathan Adored has no comment for the press at this time, either.
[14:29:09] Fauve Aeon: I'd pay to vanity publish if I found a press that made stupidly pretty books in small lots, just for fun :P
[14:29:11] Ceejay Writer: And now we move on to self-publishing, which gets a lot more of the Salon time, basically because there's SO MUCH you need to know before tackling it.
[14:29:47] Ceejay Writer: Fauve, some people do that. Espeically if they already have a waiting audience for the book. I hear quite a few comedians have used that route, weirdly enough
[14:29:57] Stereo Nacht turns to a fresh page of her notebook
[14:30:02] Ceejay Writer: And last but not least, there’s self-publishing. I’ll talk a lot more about this option because it’s the one that requires the most from you, and I want you to fully grasp the scope of work you’ll be taking on yourself as an Independent Writer.
[14:30:24] Ceejay Writer: Remember, the ‘self’ in Self Publishing is You. You’re the author. You’re in charge of getting the manuscript edited and proofed. You need to either make or hire an artist for cover art. Advertising, accounting and promoting? Tag, you’re it!
[14:30:52] Nika Thought-werk frowns.
[14:31:11] Jimmy Branagh: Yes, marketing would be the fun part ...
[14:31:15] Jimmy Branagh chuckles
[14:31:18] Ceejay Writer: If you think self-publishing began with the arrival of the internet, think again. In the mid 1700s, Benjamin Franklin wrote and self-published Poor Richard’s Almanack. A quote from that publication, “If you would not be forgotten, as soon as you are dead and rotten, either write things worth reading, or do things worth writing.”
[14:31:35] Bookworm Hienrichs chuckles.
[14:31:44] Elleon Bergamasco grins
[14:31:50] Stereo Nacht: (This quote was used in Civ IV! )
[14:31:51] Nika Thought-werk whispers "Franklin ... ah."
[14:31:57] Ceejay Writer: I know its scrunched up, but if you look at the image being displayed of Ben’s almanack, you can see at the very bottom, “Printed and fold by B FRANKLIN, at the New Printing-Office near the Market.”
[14:32:29] Ceejay Writer: In the late 1700s and early 1800s, the English poet William Blake not only wrote and self-published his own works, but created all the illustrations and etched them onto copper plates. After printing his works, he hand-colored the etchings.
[14:32:30] Nika Thought-werk smiles happily.
[14:32:50] Blossom Love: Will we be able to learn about Edward Gorey as well?
[14:32:55] Elleon Bergamasco: wow, even folding!
[14:33:21] Jedburgh Dagger: 18th century chapbooks are a whole 'nother thing
[14:33:26] Ceejay Writer: I have not included Edward Gorey in today's talk, but by Googling his name you will learn more than you could read in a week, I am sure!
[14:33:45] Ceejay Writer: They really are, Jed. I include a few as historic inspiration, though.
[14:33:48] Lady Sumoku: And much of it will rhyme.
[14:33:53] Ceejay Writer: Walt Whitman self-published the first edition of Leaves of Grass in 1855. He had 795 copies printed, and worked on binding them whenever he had the funds to pay for supplies.
[14:34:14] Nika Thought-werk smacks her lips.
[14:34:19] Steadman Kondor: sigh.... genius!
[14:34:37] Ceejay Writer: Now we will run further up the self-publishing timeline. Lightning Source was formed in 1997. They are still one of the leading print on demand publishers. Print On Demand (POD) is insanely practical. There’s no excess stock to deal with, no storage issues, no out of date books leftover if a second edition is printed, and the cost is reasonable. The print on demand concept caught on quickly, and soon iUniverse, CreateSpace (Amazon’s print division) and Lulu were offering their services to Indie authors.
[14:34:44] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Lady Sumoku!
[14:34:51] Stereo Nacht kinda wonders at the price one such first edition would have
[14:35:16] Mosseveno Tenk doesn't recommend Lulu
[14:35:29] Ceejay Writer: Beyond my reach, Stereo. Last I heard, 200 of the 795 copies of Leaves of Grass remain.
[14:35:40] Darlingmonster Ember snerks
[14:35:52] Nika Thought-werk wonders how they taste.
[14:36:12] Darlingmonster Ember: ...and the glue, leaves, grass, oh, never let a poet bind your business
[14:36:23] Ceejay Writer: I'll go off script a bit and say I don't really recommend LuLu either. The books are stiff and not cosy in the hands for reading. Their ordering system is daunting to readers, too.
[14:36:32] Magda Kamenev: Bay rum, ozone and pure, clean river water, Miss Nika.
[14:36:48] Ceejay Writer: There’s a learning curve with POD, just as there is with every aspect of Indie publishing, but once you’ve got it figure out, I think you’ll love it. The image showing now is my own book cover, showing the front, spine and back, all of which was converted to a PDF file before uploading to CreateSpace.
[14:36:58] Sheryl Skytower: *:-.,_,.-:*'``'*Yayyyyyyy!!!!*:-.,_,.-:*'``'*
[14:37:12] Steadman Kondor: i will play devils advocate and say i have found lulu's paperbacks i purchased quite fine glossy cover and creamy quality pages
[14:37:53] Ceejay Writer: Fair enough, Steadman. I know personal preferences play into this. Their covers ARE nice and glossy, yes!
[14:38:08] Ceejay Writer: After the first upload, I ordered a copy of the book to be sent to me. I checked it over and realized the spine was too narrow - parts of the front and back cover were folding over to the spine. Adjustments were made, a new PDF was uploaded, and I was much happier with the tweaks. Now, whenever a paperback copy is ordered, it’s printed and sent out, so quickly that readers usually have no clue that the book they hold in their hand didn’t exist until they placed their order.
[14:38:35] Nika Thought-werk smiles.
[14:38:47] Ceejay Writer: Some of you may already be published writers and not even realize it. Journaling and Blogging *are* Indie Writing! They can be satisfying on their own merit, or start a writer on a path to publication.
[14:39:04] Daniel Rothchen: but are the pages designed to last... thats where most publishes get you . A few years later your book is browning and starting to turn to dust on your shelves.
[14:39:14] Ceejay Writer: Around 1999, we started hearing a weird word being bandied about. ‘Bloggers’ were using various easy-to-set-up websites to share serial novels, fanfiction, and promote their own works. LiveJournal was cutting-edge back then, and helped give rise to writers like Cassie Claire, who wrote Harry Potter and Lord of The Rings fanfic in her younger days. (I admit I LOVED her Very Secret Diaries, and still occasionally mutter, ‘Cannot cope, off to Mordor’.) She’s since gone on to publish YA books through Simon & Schuster and Scholastic, and reportedly makes absurd bushel baskets of money these days.
[14:39:42] Jedburgh Dagger: LJ *waves*
[14:39:43] Steadman Kondor: also (erhem) diary of a callgirl etc... bloggers to mainstream publishing fame
[14:40:04] Ceejay Writer: I used to be LJ Famous. *koff*
[14:40:18] Lady Sumoku: The best bushel baskets for money are the absurd ones.
[14:40:19] Ceejay Writer: In 2002, Julie Powell’s The Julie/Julia Project blog, which was a chronicle of her attempt to prepare every dish in Julia Child’s Mastering the Art of French Cooking, eventually led to the the publishing of the book Julie and Julia: 365 Days, 524 Recipes, 1 Tiny Apartment Kitchen AND the 2009 movie Julie & Julia. Which was *great*. Find it and watch it.
[14:40:23] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Abaloneka Resident!
[14:40:23] Fauve Aeon: I am also curious how the books hold up over time
[14:40:29] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Minorsun Resident!
[14:40:41] Darlingmonster Ember: oh good example
[14:40:41] Sheryl Skytower: A lot of fanfic authors moved on to pro. :)
[14:40:44] Ceejay Writer: I will come back in a decade with my book in hand and let you know!
[14:40:56] Ceejay Writer nods at Sheryl
[14:41:06] Ceejay Writer: By 2008, IndieGoGo, Kickstarter, and RocketHub appeared on the web, giving authors another resource to help with the expenses of self-publishing a book. A heads-up for you—on February 29, 2016, Publaunch.com will start offering crowdfunding events specifically for books and publishing services.
[14:41:24] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Riven Homewood!
[14:41:37] Ceejay Writer: So, all that being said… what *exactly* are the tasks you’ll need to take care of as an Independent Author? Let’s find out.
[14:41:38] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Wildstar Beaumont!
[14:41:41] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach waves at Fraulein Homewood
[14:41:46] Nika Thought-werk waves happily to Miss Riven.
[14:41:54] Ceejay Writer: Toss your pride aside and get a critique of your final draft. Round up a few Beta Readers and take their comments to heart.
[14:42:16] Ceejay Writer: After you’ve tweaked the needfuls recommended by the Beta Readers… secure an editor to give your work that final polish before publishing. Don’t be so presumptuous as to think ‘I’ve read it a dozen times, I am positive it is perfect.’ Trust me, it’s not. You are too close to the work, and that makes you blind to the flaws. If you cannot afford an editor, who will point out plot flaws, rearrange your badly worded sentences and fix all your punctuation as well as letting you know where your book bogs down and where it’s awesome, at the very least, hire a proofreader to kill all the punctuation mistakes, synonym misfires, and shrapnel.
[14:42:41] Stereo Nacht: (As an English as second laguage to read too, to catch the little stupid mistakes that got through? ;-) )
[14:42:44] Ceejay Writer: What is shrapnel? Shrapnel happens when you re-write a sentence over and over, and in the end forget to remove some of the leftover words. I edited Pip Ballantine’s Weather Child. It’s a magnificent book, and I highly recommend it! Especially after I carted out at least three trailer loads of shrapnel. :) We are all prone to producing it, and you would be amazed at how much if it you can go blind to as the author.
[14:43:01] Stereo Nacht: (*ask*)
[14:43:07] Nika Thought-werk frowns.
[14:43:16] Ceejay Writer: Stereo is a treasure, as her eyes take nothing for granted in our English written manuscripts
[14:43:30] Nika Thought-werk adds "Writing can be like warfare, yes."
[14:43:34] Ceejay Writer: Start building your platforms. Make a website. Create Facebook and Twitter pages. Set up a GoodReads account. And that’s the bare minimum. Don’t wait till you’re published to get this all settled. Do it in advance so when your head is spinning at LEAST you have these things in place.
[14:43:55] Ceejay Writer: Back to Beta Reading. Give copies of your manuscript to some readers who will give you feedback, and if you are very lucky and the gods of the quills are smiling upon you, they will respond with some quotable phrases you can use in promotion, or even on your back cover!
[14:44:21] Ceejay Writer: Choose your publishing service. Are you going to go paperback or digital or both? Every service has its own formatting and cover art requirements. It’s good to know what they are so you can get the info to your artist, if you’ve hired one.
[14:44:30] Stereo Nacht giggles at the picture
[14:44:40] Ceejay Writer: Or… choose your publishing services, plural. You CAN publish at Amazon and elsewhere too, but you’ll need to carefully choose the right answers when you set up your agreement with Amazon. If you are willing to take 35% in royalties, you are free to publish anywhere else you like. If you want Amazon’s tempting 70% royalties, you will give up your rights to publish elsewhere.
[14:44:55] Ceejay Writer: (Sheryl, it's 35% at Amazon now, right? )
[14:45:13] Sheryl Skytower: I believe so....
[14:45:15] Maxwell Grantly: royalities at amazon depend on what price you sell your ebook for
[14:45:23] Ceejay Writer: Those percentages are for Kindle eBooks.
[14:45:25] Sheryl Skytower mumbles something about highway robbery
[14:45:49] Jimmy Branagh chuckles
[14:46:07] Jimmy Branagh: "Who said anything about paying the writer?"
[14:46:10] Ceejay Writer: Choose wisely, and take all the time you need to read everyone’s contracts and rules. Don’t rush this step. Learn everything you need to know.
[14:46:27] Ceejay Writer: Hire an artist or dig in yourself to create your cover art. Browse bookstores with an eye to everyone else’s cover art. See what works for you and what doesn’t. This will help you finalize your vision for your cover art. Read the requirements your chosen publisher has provided to be sure about the requirements for the final art upload.
[14:46:34] Daniel Rothchen: Many suggest spending most of your money on getting a good editor before publishing on Amazon and its ilk .. would you agree?
[14:46:59] Ceejay Writer: My opinion - put the money into editing and cover art.
[14:47:17] Ceejay Writer: Upload your manuscript. Then proof the output. Every page. If you have chosen to use multiple distribution points, you’ll need to do this step for each version; Kindle, Nook, Paperback, PDF… one might be perfect, but another format might need help.
[14:47:22] Nika Thought-werk whispers "Ah, cover art ..."
[14:47:45] Ceejay Writer: BLURBIE TIME. This may be the toughest step yet, other than actually writing the book. For marketing purposes, you will need some promotional wording. Craft some short tagline sentences, two long synopsis (one with spoilers and one without), a short synopsis, something that fits Twitter’s limitations, and any other snappy bits you can think of to help keep interest high in social media. Save these all in one document for on the fly cutting and pasting.
[14:47:48] Steadman Kondor: big publishers are starting to skimp on their cover art now, unfortunately. comfirmed by mates in the industry...
[14:48:16] Ceejay Writer: Indie authors should take note of that! There's an area to outdo the big guys.
[14:48:20] Satu Moreau: A bad cover too can repel instead of attract a reader.
[14:48:22] Steadman Kondor: yes!
[14:48:43] Ceejay Writer: I admit to buying some books based on cover art.
[14:48:44] Jimmy Branagh: Get Stephen King to say "It's amazing!" to you, for any reason. Fair back cover quote.
[14:48:48] Jimmy Branagh grins
[14:48:52] Ceejay Writer: :D
[14:48:53] Maxwell Grantly: never judge a book based on its cover - but we do!
[14:48:54] Ceejay Writer: Have a high res author photo and a written bio ready for the world to see. Scary. I set up a Media Kit page at my website and shoved these things in there for easy access.
[14:48:56] Riven Homewood: Especially covers that don't seem to have anything to do with the book
[14:49:06] Nika Thought-werk giggles at Mister Jimmy.
[14:49:09] Ceejay Writer: Start thinking about advertising. Will you have book giveaway contests? Will you pay for ads on Facebook and other sites? Will you find blogs to be a guest writer on, will you try to get interviewed, will you haul boxes of your book to signings, will you sign up as an author at conventions?
[14:49:25] Ceejay Writer looks at clock, talks faster
[14:49:37] Ceejay Writer: Reviews: You’re probably going to have to beg for them, dangle free review copies in front of people’s faces, beg some more, and never stop groveling. Amazon’s cracked down hard on who can post reviews, and will slap your hand if they think you book has been loaded up with reviews from family and friends. It’s frustrating. And you NEED reviews. Within the online eBook seller websites, those reviews are what push your book up from the basement to where readers can actually find it on their own. When the reviews taper off, your book sinks again.
[14:49:37] Darlingmonster Ember smiles
[14:49:43] Riven Homewood: All of the above, if you want to be known and sell your book
[14:49:58] Ceejay Writer nods
[14:50:03] Ceejay Writer: Those of you who read (I hope that’s everyone!): When an author encourages you to review their book, they are *really* hoping you will. Post an honest review. It doesn’t have to be long. A sentence or two will do. And repost it at GoodReads, even if you don’t like the place much. :) It’s got some clout. You will have done something very important for that book, and it’s writer.
[14:50:18] Nika Thought-werk nods quietly.
[14:50:29] Ceejay Writer: As an Indie Writer, you are responsible for all aspects of your book. You’ll find allies and help along the way, but not if you don’t seek them out, and pay them when appropriate. At the end of the day, it’s all on you. But on the flip side anything fantastic that comes of this publishing adventure is all yours, too. :) It can be incredibly satisfying.
[14:51:05] Ceejay Writer: And finally, the last step. Sit back, relax, try not to yell at the inevitable crappy reviews, and get used to the notion that you are a published author. And then get started on your next book.
[14:51:41] Darlingmonster Ember: !think a book ahead if you can!
[14:51:55] Sheryl Skytower: Think three!
[14:52:02] Ceejay Writer: And that's my advice! I know we have other authors in this room and I value their experiences and opinions too. Feel free to make yourself known if you wish to let others ask you questions later, too.
[14:52:13] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Wulfriðe Blitzen!
[14:52:20] Stereo Nacht thinks of all those writing projects waiting for her, then all her craft projects, and starts thinking she needs three lifes
[14:52:20] Steadman Kondor: and dont quit your day job
[14:52:22] Ceejay Writer: I do have a gift for everyone who was kind enough to come today. I've also, by way of following my own advice, stuck a promotional notecard for my book inside the gift. Leading by example. *wink* Enjoy!
[14:52:24] Jimmy Branagh: hehe
[14:52:25] Daniel Rothchen: On DiviantArt, I understand there are alot fine graphic artists that can be hired for your cover art. They are not big time but yet professional freelancers.
[14:52:29] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, EmiScordata Resident!
[14:52:35] Bookworm Hienrichs grins and applauds.
[14:52:35] Magda Kamenev cheers!
[14:52:43] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Maxwell Grantly!
[14:52:44] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Bookworm Hienrichs!
[14:52:46] Jimmy Branagh applauds
[14:52:48] Darlingmonster Ember applauds
[14:52:50] Blossom Love: Bravo!
[14:52:51] Maxwell Grantly claps
[14:52:52] Stereo Nacht: `*.¸.*´ APPLAUSE `*.¸.*´APPLAUSE `*.¸.*´
[14:52:52] Ceejay Writer: DeviantArt has WONDERFUL artists. Just get one with a decent attention span!
[14:52:52] Steadman Kondor: :) applauds . Thank you!
[14:52:54] Darlingmonster Ember applauds
[14:52:54] Wulfriðe Blitzen Applauds
[14:52:54] Maxwell Grantly: ஜॐ♥ஜ______ஜॐ♥ஜ
[14:52:54] Maxwell Grantly: APPLAUSE!!!
[14:52:54] Maxwell Grantly: APPLAUSE!!!
[14:52:54] Maxwell Grantly: APPLAUSE!!!
[14:52:54] Maxwell Grantly: ஜॐ♥ஜ______ஜॐ♥ஜ
[14:52:56] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Jimmy Branagh!
[14:52:56] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Jedburgh30 Dagger!
[14:52:56] Sheryl Skytower applauds
[14:52:56] Sera Puchkina applauds
[14:52:59] OldeSoul Eldemar: thank you so much !
[14:53:00] Dr. Henry Jekyll applauds.
[14:53:00] Solace Fairlady: Thank you Miss Ceejay for a fabulous talk!
[14:53:03] Sheryl Skytower: *:-.,_,.-:*'``'*Yayyyyyyy!!!!*:-.,_,.-:*'``'*
[14:53:09] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Serafina Puchkina!
[14:53:09] Solace Fairlady applauds heartily
[14:53:10] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Fraulein Ceejay, if your fellow authors here - Nika, Fraulein Skytower and anyone else - could list their books' titles and where to find them, they will be in the transcript.
[14:53:12] Abaloneka Resident claps
[14:53:12] Sheryl Skytower: *raises paw* If anyone wants info on the romance writing industry, please feel free to drop me a pm and I'll help if I can.
[14:53:14] Lady Sumoku cheers
[14:53:15] Darlingmonster Ember: wait...artists have attention spans?
[14:53:17] Nathan Adored: yes, very interesting and informative talk
[14:53:17] Erin Brennan: Wonderful talk!
[14:53:23] Nika Thought-werk cheers "Miss Writer, great work and great words!"
[14:53:24] Emerson Lighthouse whistles
[14:53:29] Maxwell Grantly: thank you very much for a well-researched and useful lecture, full of personal advice and information
[14:53:33] Steadman Kondor: I'd love to collect all new babbage authors for my clockhaven bookshop.
[14:53:34] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Myrtil Igaly!
[14:53:38] Nathan Adored: may I friend you, miss ceejay?
[14:53:45] Steadman Kondor: Please message me if i dont contact you over the next two weeks
[14:53:49] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Nika, Sheryl, do speak up.
[14:53:53] Sheryl Skytower: I have... 13 books presently out with four this year. I am agented and can be found at www.sherylnantus.com. :)
[14:53:54] Ceejay Writer: I also have a page at my website listing BABBAGE authors too. Let me find that link. And your giftie is on the stage now. The box is my book cover. (Endlessly promotes)
[14:54:00] Fauve Aeon: I have articles in here http://www.amazon.com/Horror-Addicts-Guide-Life-Emerian/dp/1508772525
[14:54:01] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Stereo Nacht!
[14:54:07] Steadman Kondor scribbles
[14:54:21] Emerson Lighthouse: Thanks Ceejay, great talk
[14:54:29] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: No wonder she needs cookies.
[14:54:30] Jimmy Branagh: Thanks Miss Ceejay!
[14:54:34] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Nika?
[14:54:35] Sheryl Skytower: Yay for Ceejay!
[14:54:36] Isobel DeSantis: Excellent talk, thank you ㋡
[14:54:37] Magda Kamenev: Indeed, thank you, Ceejay!
[14:54:41] Riven Homewood: That was really well-done! Thanks, Ceejay!
[14:54:43] Dr. Henry Jekyll: That was lovely, thank you Ceejay.
[14:54:44] Nathan Adored has at least three differnt novel ideas he's been poking with a stick for the last two or three decades.
[14:54:51] Wulfriðe Blitzen: Thank you Ceejay, an excellent talk!
[14:54:58] Ceejay Writer: Here, include this page in the salon transcript. http://www.brassbrightcity.com/2015/06/10/the-literary-world-of-new-babbage/
[14:55:02] Sera Puchkina: Well done, Ceejay. Thank you.
[14:55:02] Solace Fairlady: Goodness, well done Miss Sheryl!
[14:55:05] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Excellent.
[14:55:06] Maxwell Grantly: thank you
[14:55:11] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Danke, Fraulein Ceejay.
[14:55:15] Mosseveno Tenk: i spent the weekend with emerson reading a slush pile
[14:55:19] Ceejay Writer: Thank you all for coming and listening, and please let me know if anyone publishes a book I can read and review!
[14:55:20] Count Bologna: Brava!
[14:55:20] Nika Thought-werk: Sure ... presently, my first book may be found here ... and I am working on the second and the third ...http://www.amazon.com/Do-Clockworks-Dream-Gear-Toothed-Sheep-ebook/dp/B014EEOELI/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1452927137&sr=8-1
[14:55:34] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Excellent!
[14:55:45] Solace Fairlady: and congratulations Miss Nika!
[14:55:46] kalfoo Resident: Cheers Miss Ceejay
[14:55:49] Mosseveno Tenk: if you're more a short story person, check this out: http://thegrinder.diabolicalplots.com/
[14:55:59] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Danke, Herr Clockwinder.
[14:56:02] Ceejay Writer: Catching up, Nathan, yes please. :)
[14:56:12] Wright Davis chuckles: I tried my hand at writing a story, i got nearly 30,000 words into it before i burnt out
[14:56:14] Steadman Kondor scribbles
[14:56:33] Solace Fairlady: and m Clockwinder too, how amazing to be able to write stories, you are all so clever!
[14:56:40] Nika Thought-werk smiles at Miss Fairlady "Thank you!"
[14:56:42] Sheryl Skytower: I've had experience with small publishers (Samhain, Carina Press) and right now have contracts with St. Martin's Press and Entangled for romance. :) http://www.amazon.com/Sheryl-Nantus/e/B002BM60WW
[14:56:43] Ceejay Writer: Wright - perhaps your story is really a couple of novellas?
[14:56:54] Magda Kamenev: Hmm. There is also a submissions tracker and announcement board for short stories and poetry - Duotrope - but it is a subscription service.
[14:57:06] Daniel Rothchen: Are there helpful writing aides that can help writers focus and clean-up and/or organize there thougts
[14:57:07] Jimmy Branagh mutters about 117,000 words ...
[14:57:15] Ceejay Writer: Sheryl knows MUCH more than I do about agents and small publishers. Lets tackle her!
[14:57:23] Magda Kamenev: https://duotrope.com/
[14:57:24] Mosseveno Tenk: the grinder was inspired by duotrope's subscription prices. it's the free version
[14:57:25] Sheryl Skytower: If you're looking for a good writing forum for all genres and self-pubbing, may I suggest Absolute Write? www.absolutewrite.com/forums/
[14:58:04] Wright Davis: It probably is, i think parts of it need a rewrite, i need to balance out the characters more, and i lost the plot when it came to the main villain, one day i'll return to it and fix the issues i have with it.
[14:58:08] Magda Kamenev bids adieu to all.
[14:58:12] Ceejay Writer: Absolute Write is GOOD!
[14:58:22] Solace Fairlady: safe travels Miss magz!
[14:58:24] Sheryl Skytower: Good forum for those looking for help from first page to last. Publishing, agents, bewares and all the contacts you can find!
[14:58:25] Lady Sumoku waves
[14:58:30] Wildstar Beaumont: good night everybody !
[14:58:36] Stereo Nacht: Good night Ms. Kamenev!
[14:58:40] Solace Fairlady: fair winds Admiral!
[14:58:42] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Gute Nacht and Danke, those leaving.
[14:58:42] OldeSoul Eldemar: Take care everyone !
[14:58:44] Satu Moreau: :) Thank you, Ceejay, Baron.
[14:58:47] Dr. Henry Jekyll: Farewell, miss.
[14:58:48] Rufus the Drunk: Nighty-niiiiiiight
[14:58:52] Jimmy Branagh: Gotta run too! Noight awl!
[14:58:52] Ceejay Writer: Take care, leaving ones!
[14:58:56] Stereo Nacht: Good night Mr. Eldemar!
[14:58:58] Sheryl Skytower waves
[14:59:00] Jimmy Branagh: \Thenks again Miss Ceejay!
[14:59:04] Myrtil Igaly's head spins with so much information
[14:59:05] Stereo Nacht: Good night Mr. Branagh!
[14:59:12] Myrtil Igaly: Thank you Miss Ceejay!
[14:59:16] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Everyone is welcome to stay as long as Fraulein Ceejay has the energy for it.
[14:59:17] Fauve Aeon: Thank you, most informative!
[14:59:20] Isobel DeSantis: Thank you so much for a wonderful talk!
[14:59:21] Jimmy Branagh waves
[14:59:29] Stereo Nacht: Oh, well, good night everyone, and I'll read what I missed in the trascript!
[14:59:35] Isobel DeSantis grabs a cookie on the way out
[14:59:38] Dr. Henry Jekyll: I suppose I ought to get going myself. Thank you for the talk, Miss Ceejay.
[14:59:40] Myrtil Igaly: Good night everyone!
[14:59:46] Steadman Kondor waves
[14:59:54] Elleon Bergamasco: thanks so much
[14:59:56] Ceejay Writer: Daniel, I think using beta readers to help you focus your thoughs is a good route. Get some feedback and adjust till you are satisfied
[14:59:59] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Nathan Adored!
[15:00:14] Ceejay Writer: I am catching up with chats! I can stay a while.
[15:00:42] Elleon Bergamasco: I'm curious about the audiobook option...
[15:00:44] Wright Davis: i've been part of a group with some friends where we have an ongoing adventure game, one of us is tasked with writing the current adventure, that's also helped me improve, especially when it comes to plot formation
[15:00:45] Nathan Adored: hmmmmm.... did workshop groups get mentioned today, too? If so, I blinked and missed it
[15:01:12] Nathan Adored: That is, the idea of joining a group of fellow struggling writers to help each other get better at it
[15:01:15] Lady Sumoku disconnected too often to know what got covered.
[15:01:26] Salon Speaker Tipjar: Thank you for supporting the Aether Salon, Peaches Latrell!
[15:02:11] Steadman Kondor: for writing groups you need a strong and kind convenor
[15:02:16] Darlingmonster Ember: there are some good workshop groups online
[15:02:23] Darlingmonster Ember: but be choosy
[15:02:29] Steadman Kondor: or you get ripped to shreds ... or the opposite - you only get claps and praises
[15:02:29] Sheryl Skytower: Absolute Write can also help you avoid the scammers and shady publishers - highly recommend going there, you can lurk and relax as you read. :)
[15:02:57] Ceejay Writer: The audio book is something I'm learning right now. I'm having mine read for Audible even as we speak.
[15:03:02] Wright Davis: yes, just working with other writers can be a boon, especially if it's an informal thing, C.S. Lewis and J. R.R. Tolkein were part of a writing group together.
[15:03:13] Nathan Adored: I'm in a writers workshop sorta group over on the small opensim world Nara's Nook, they meet certain Monday nights at 6pm pt
[15:03:29] Ceejay Writer: I DID not know till I got well into it that a totally different type of cover art is needed for audio books, since they also sell in jewel boxes. So you need a square cover for that step.
[15:03:32] Fauve Aeon: my art support groups have often turn into grumpy whining, I've been afraid to join a writer's group. at least with art, you can ignore the words :D
[15:03:42] Nathan Adored: but I'm still at the scribbling-down-ideas-to-go-into-a-novel stage of writing
[15:03:47] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: I seem to remember there's a professional fellow who has writing resources here on the grid.
[15:03:52] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Michael someone.
[15:03:59] Ceejay Writer: Michale Stackpole.
[15:04:05] Nika Thought-werk nods.
[15:04:08] Ceejay Writer: You;ll find his info inside the gift. :D
[15:04:13] Darlingmonster Ember: :D
[15:04:16] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach nods
[15:04:30] Sheryl Skytower: Mike's a good guy. See him every year at Origins Game Fair. Excellent advice from him!
[15:04:37] Darlingmonster Ember: fab u lous, nice to see so much energy in this group
[15:04:37] Nathan Adored: hmmmmm.... yeah, that makes sense. square cover art for audio book CDs
[15:04:52] Elleon Bergamasco: Baron, I do hope the Baronin is well. please send her my regards.
[15:05:20] Darlingmonster Ember: Thank you so much Miss Ceejay
[15:05:23] Ceejay Writer: I had to rip my cover to bits and re-do it to get the audible cover.
[15:05:32] Bixyl Shuftan: need to head out, thank you again, Ceejay
[15:05:37] Bixyl Shuftan tips his hat
[15:05:41] Ceejay Writer: If anyone has questions later, I'm an open book. *laughs* ceejay.writer@gmail.com
[15:05:45] Sheryl Skytower: And don't do your own audio book! Pay for a professional! *laughs*
[15:05:57] Ceejay Writer: YES! Gawd, I would not want my voice on my book
[15:05:58] Darlingmonster Ember: welcome Zanta
[15:06:02] Dee Wells Dagger waves to the Baronin :)
[15:06:11] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach puts an arm around his wife and kisses her cheek
[15:06:14] Wright Davis: unless you have the voice of morgan freeman
[15:06:15] Solace Fairlady: Guten abend your majesty! what a fabulous landing you have:)
[15:06:24] Fauve Aeon waves to the baronin
[15:06:31] Elleon Bergamasco: lemony snicket did his and it was terrible!!
[15:06:32] Ceejay Writer: Sometimes I do have Morgan's voice. Which is sad cause I am female.
[15:06:39] Baronin Zantabraxus smiles to everybody and apologizes for her tardiness
[15:06:44] Bookworm Hienrichs laughs.
[15:06:48] Sheryl Skytower: I'm open for emails as well at sherylnantus@gmail.com - I only know about romance writing, so... :)
[15:06:49] Elleon Bergamasco: hallo!
[15:07:01] Lady Sumoku: You came late and missed all my crashing.
[15:07:02] Wright Davis: that's not sad, mr freeman's voice can turn stardust into diamonds
[15:07:06] Darlingmonster Ember: Toodles all
[15:07:21] Nika Thought-werk: Be well, all of you. I will be off for now.
[15:07:21] Juliette Delmonte: Sorry Elleon
[15:07:28] Solace Fairlady: thank you again Miss ceejay and much mojo for your next publication!
[15:07:42] Solace Fairlady waves and flits!
[15:07:49] Sheryl Skytower: *hugs Ceejay* Yay!
[15:07:50] Ceejay Writer: Hee. Okay, I am going to flit back to my library and answer a few of the more thoughtful longer questions I recedived in IM's
[15:07:58] Nika Thought-werk nods at Miss Fairlady's words and poofs.
[15:08:06] Peaches Latrell Kronos: thank you for the wonderful talk
[15:08:06] Ceejay Writer: Thank you everyone, it was great to see you all get so animated about writing!
[15:08:10] Elleon Bergamasco: thank you for a wonderful talk
[15:08:15] Maxwell Grantly: thank you once again
[15:08:18] Maxwell Grantly: good night all
[15:08:19] Ceejay Writer: Absolutely my pleasure.
[15:08:28] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach applauds
[15:08:33] Steadman Kondor: take care all :)
[15:08:37] Steadman Kondor: sorry i cant find the tip jar
[15:08:41] Bookworm Hienrichs applauds Ceejay.
[15:08:44] Steadman Kondor: (am blind)
[15:08:51] Steadman Kondor: is there one for the author and the salon?
[15:09:07] Fauve Aeon grabs all the cookies, stands and runs for it *grin*
[15:09:10] Lady Sumoku: The author's is by the stage
[15:09:18] Nathan Adored: hmmmmmm..... I tihnk the Speaker one is the jar in front of the slideshow thingy
[15:09:20] Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: The author one was up front, the Salon ones are around, including this fine clank overhead.
[15:09:21] Sheryl Skytower gasps and runs after Fauve
[15:09:24] Lady Sumoku: The salon's is the wall sign or the hovering thing.
[15:09:35] Elleon Bergamasco: oh dear Sheryl
[15:09:47] Wulfriðe Blitzen: I will make her book available in my bookshop in New Baggage Main tonight

Wednesday, December 23, 2015

AEther Salon: Clausology III (Edited Transcript)

Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Welcome, everyone, to December's Aether Salon. We thank you for finding the time to attend, and hope you'll enjoy today's topic.
Ceejay Writer: Elleon, I got that gift once and it vanished in a puff of steam
Elleon Bergamasco: drats
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Before we begin, a few housekeeping items:
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: 1) To ensure you can hear the speaker, stand or sit on the patterned carpet.
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: 2) If you do not have a wearable chair and wish one, please contact me in IM.
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: 3) Please remove all lag-feeding thingamajigs you might be wearing.
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: 4) A tip jar is out for our speaker. Do please show your appreciation!
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: 5) Any tips to help support the establishment will also be welcome - just click on one of the support signs or this handsome clank floating above us.
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: 6) If you're not a member of the AEther Salon group, there are signs that will let you join up. You'll be most heartily welcome.
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: 7) Edited and unedited transcripts of these proceedings will be posted at aethersalon.blogspot.com.
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: And lastly:
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: 8) Tea and treats are set out - help yourself!
Elleon Bergamasco: /me applauds and eyes the treats
Jimmy Branagh: An' don't stare directly inta th' Boiler Elf's oyes.  'ee'll take it as a challenge.
[Myrtil Igaly: /me applauds
Darlingmonster Ember: /me applauds
Ceejay Writer: /me dons sunglasses
Wulfriðe Blitzen: /me applauds
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Our speaker today almost needs no introduction. He has been visiting New Babbage annually for some time accompanying Steam Santa, and examining children's souls before they sit on the fabled lap.
Zantabraxus: /me applauds
Darlingmonster Ember: grins
Fauve Aeon: /me escap...erm Missed...Santa, it seems... :D
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: This is the third year he has been willing to break his busy schedule to discuss the origins, traditions and personages of Christmas with us. I give you the Boiler Elf.
Jimmy Branagh: /me applauds
Lady Sumoku: /me claps
Fauve Aeon: YAY!
Elleon Bergamasco: /me applauds
Myrtil Igaly: Yay!!
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: /me applauds
Jimmy Branagh: Yay Boiler Elf!
Dee Wells Dagger: /me shudders
Ceejay Writer: YAY!
Darlingmonster Ember: /me applauds
Wulfriðe Blitzen: /me claps
Zantabraxus: /me applauds
Mosseveno Tenk: look at all those naughty children out there!
Timothy Sootworth: ooo
Mosseveno Tenk: i'm going to have so much fun with you when you get to the pole
Jimmy Branagh: /me turns around and looks
Magda Kamenev: /me cheers!
Fauve Aeon: where???
Elleon Bergamasco: /me hides behind Jimmy
Myrtil Igaly: Awww he's got a tiny pet rat with a Santa hat!
Mosseveno Tenk: Merry Christmas!
Mosseveno Tenk: /me puts his hand to his ear
Jimmy Branagh: Merry Christmas!
Elleon Bergamasco: Merry Christmas!
Magda Kamenev: Merry Christmas!
Dr. Henry Jekyll: /me raises an eyebrow, like he thinks the boiler elf looks like someone else.
Joey: rat=\
Mosseveno Tenk: oh com on now, we do this every year
Lady Sumoku: Mumble That-mas!
Joey: =
Joey: yummm
Mosseveno Tenk: all christians this year? i sort of doubt that....
Fauve Aeon: Happy Merrymas!
Ceejay Writer: /me whispers, 'he comes from a large family I think'
Mosseveno Tenk: let's try again...
Mosseveno Tenk: Merry Christmas!
Jimmy Branagh: shouts: MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!
Garth Goode: /me thinks, "No one wil see past my disguise, bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha!"
Lady Sumoku: Merry Christmas!
Myrtil Igaly: Joyeux Noël!
Dr. Henry Jekyll: Merry Christmas!
Dee Wells Dagger: Merry Christmas!
Timothy Sootworth: merrycristmas
Fauve Aeon: God Jul
Ceejay Writer: HAPPY COAL WEEK!
Elleon Bergamasco: Merry Christmas! Mele Kaliki Maka!
Mosseveno Tenk: I like a sincere greeting,
Mosseveno Tenk: as almost evrey culture has a celebration near the solstice, i would expect to hear the one you celebrate!
Darlingmonster Ember: /me flutters her eyelashes at Boiler Elf
Mosseveno Tenk: so
Mosseveno Tenk: i looked over last years transcript to try and remebe what we were talking about
Mosseveno Tenk: i believe we left off in scandinavia
Mosseveno Tenk: so here's a little cartoon to get you in the mood
Mosseveno Tenk: http://satwcomic.com/christmas-traditions
Magda Kamenev: /me wonders if she missed Spain's miraculous ... er, log.
Wildstar Beaumont: /me waves silently
Ceejay Writer: Muahahaha
Myrtil Igaly: hehehe
Darlingmonster Ember: giggles
Jimmy Branagh: /me laughs
Mosseveno Tenk: last year we talke about some of the more unusual characters, and miss kameneve was kind enough to educate me on the spanish 'shitting man' that we were looking at
Mosseveno Tenk: i'll show you a picture
Timothy Sootworth: /me giggles
Dee Wells Dagger: 0.O
Dr. Henry Jekyll: /me looks over the comic. "EH heh heh... Interesting."
Garth Goode: ha
Mosseveno Tenk: what is his proper name, miss K?
Mosseveno Tenk: if you don't belive this, please google image it
Ceejay Writer: Looks delicious. Yes, delicious is the word I am thinking of
Mosseveno Tenk: now he is a nativity character. the story is thus:
Myrtil Igaly: it really looks like a log
Mosseveno Tenk: while at the nativity, he had to relieve himself
Mosseveno Tenk: so he did, in a corner of the manger
Mosseveno Tenk: and baby Jesus smiled at him
Mosseveno Tenk: and his feces turned to candy fudge
Ceejay Writer: (that wasn' a smile, it was gas)
Mosseveno Tenk: and it seems that this was a lifelong condition
Fauve Aeon: whispers: ewww
Dee Wells Dagger: I did try to forget this story, and he opens with it -.-
Mosseveno Tenk: for the rest of his life, when children saw him
Darlingmonster Ember: /me takes furious notes
Mosseveno Tenk: they would chase him down and beat him with sticks to make him number two
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: /me nosepinches
Mosseveno Tenk: and he didn't seem to have a problem wtih this, beucase it made the children happy
Liz Wilner: goodness
Myrtil Igaly: Awwww!
Jimmy Branagh: What happened when a fake Shitting Man showed up?
Lady Sumoku: Now that's what I call Christmas.
Mosseveno Tenk: so when it came time for him to pass on, he met with sait peter at the gates of heaven
Fauve Aeon: /me giggles
Mosseveno Tenk: and asked if there was a way he could stay
Joey: Is dat why lil kids are often terds?
Mosseveno Tenk: so he was transformed into ... A LOG!
Fauve Aeon: Yul log?
Lady Sumoku: Everyone loves LOG.
Jimmy Branagh: /me chuckles
Mosseveno Tenk: which is how we know him today. the spanish christmas log
Jimmy Branagh: LOG is fab
Dr. Henry Jekyll: /me tries to smile, even though he clearly seemed a bit fightened. "....Charming tale."
Mosseveno Tenk: and as you see, he still make delicious candy when you beat him with a stick
Ceejay Writer: Its big its heavy THATS NOT WOOD
Dee Wells Dagger: /me decides to go with the pie
Myrtil Igaly: Yes it does look yummy
Lady Sumoku: /me laughs.
Lady Sumoku: It's better than naughty, it's nice!
Mosseveno Tenk: so there it is. his name is uncle christmas, or somethign to that effect
Elleon Bergamasco: this is SO wrong!
Ceejay Writer: I love awful traditions
Stereo Nacht: /me waves quietly
Mosseveno Tenk: and i think when you go visit santa in the mall in spain, the exit slide is often out a giant rear end
Fauve Aeon: /me will brb
Zantabraxus: /me smiles at Liz
Magda Kamenev: /me claps!
Dee Wells Dagger: Eeeewwww
Jimmy Branagh: /me chuckles
Darlingmonster Ember: /me applauds
Mosseveno Tenk: did i get that right Mags?
Liz Wilner: /me smiles back at Zanta
Magda Kamenev: I believe so!
Ceejay Writer: I need to find some Mexican sims in SL and see what's up
Magda Kamenev: But I defer to your expert wisdom in all matter Nöel.
Mosseveno Tenk: another character that got passed over was from france. where we have 'Pere Noel'
Myrtil Igaly: Yay!!
Mosseveno Tenk: here he is from an antique postcard
Dr. Henry Jekyll: Oh, isn't that France's awnser to St. Nicholas?
Mosseveno Tenk: now we talked about the 'followers' of nicholas, often pagan creatures that had been tamed by nicholas and were allowed to roam for a brief time to scare children during the midwinter season
Mosseveno Tenk: now pere noel, to me, has the most disturbing follower of them all.
Joey: Scaring kids...now we talking fun
Mosseveno Tenk: and his name is pere fouettard
Mosseveno Tenk: which i believe translates to 'whipping man', is that right, myrtil?
Myrtil Igaly: yup
Ceejay Writer: eeek!
Darlingmonster Ember: /me shivers
Jimmy Branagh: He looks like Saruman
Myrtil Igaly: Father Whipper
Elleon Bergamasco: ouch
Dr. Henry Jekyll: ... Wait, so he kept another man as a pet?
Mosseveno Tenk: now as you may expect from the french, this is a gastronomic tale
Elleon Bergamasco: Father Whipper... Whipper snapper?
Joey: Doesnt eveyone?
Mosseveno Tenk: fouettard was ....
Mosseveno Tenk: a butcher
Mosseveno Tenk: him, or his wife
Mosseveno Tenk: lured three boys into the shop
Ceejay Writer: /me cries
Darlingmonster Ember: oh no
Mosseveno Tenk: where he slaughtered, dressed, and salted them
Dee Wells Dagger: 0.O
Mosseveno Tenk: but
Dr. Henry Jekyll: .....
Darlingmonster Ember: /me faints
Joey: /me puts paws over ears
Mosseveno Tenk: then saint nicholas just happened by
Mosseveno Tenk: he resurrected the boys
Joey: yeah
Mosseveno Tenk: and fouetard, in penance, now is one of the dark followers of nicholas
Ceejay Writer: Did the boys get therapy? Cause... memories, like the corners of my mind
Elleon Bergamasco: Best result!
Lady Sumoku: I hope that includes redress and unsalting.
Mosseveno Tenk: /me shakes it off
Jimmy Branagh: After thet, they wos known as The Salty Boys
Myrtil Igaly: oh the boys were happy, they felt as if they just had a good sleep and dreamed
Ceejay Writer: whew
Dr. Henry Jekyll): ... Erm.
Mosseveno Tenk: and there's the rest of the story. thank you miss myrtil
Myrtil Igaly: You're welcome!
Darlingmonster Ember: /me suddenly decides to pick up smoking again
Mosseveno Tenk: /me changes pictures
Mosseveno Tenk: now we left off in scandinavia, where mr. holmes was telling us how sixth graders got to dress up like nuttipukki and go scare the kindergarten class
Mosseveno Tenk: which means finland is an awesome place to grow up
Darlingmonster Ember: charming!
Jimmy Branagh: SOunds like it
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: /me chuckles
Mosseveno Tenk: and here we have an antique postcard showing the christmas goat, scaring little kids at home
Myrtil Igaly: Look how the parents look happy in the background
Lady Sumoku: /me wonders what the High Schoolers do to the sixth graders.
Dr. Henry Jekyll: That... is disturbing.
Joey: Glad to see somestill remember the true meanie of Chrsitmas
Dee Wells Dagger: Hehe Myrtil
Magda Kamenev: /me snorts.
Mosseveno Tenk: the yule goat in scandinavia is a very ancient character, going back to prechristian times,
Fauve Aeon: whispers: sper {{goat}}
Dr. Henry Jekyll: Hang on, does that goat have human legs?
Mosseveno Tenk: which remeber, wasn't as long ago as other places, as finland wasnt' christenized utnil the 14th centry
Mosseveno Tenk: we're not quite sure how it ties in
Joey: Don't that just get your goat?
Mosseveno Tenk: in ancient times, the last sheaf of grain harvested was set aside because it had magical properties. it was called the 'julbocken'
Mosseveno Tenk: or yule goat
Darlingmonster Ember: The Yule Goat is not that old, nor does he have his own pinup calendar....
Mosseveno Tenk: the straw goat, here, which is still made to this day for the holidays
Joey: oooooo pinup goats (licks chops)
Fauve Aeon: /me frowns
Lady Sumoku: Aww cute
Mosseveno Tenk: we know thor drove a cart pulled by 2 goats, but its conjecture to point to that as an origin
Lady Sumoku: Thor had class.
Mosseveno Tenk: now the yule goat, like krampus, or theotehr followers,
Joey: Thor = Santa??
Joey: nnahhhh
Mosseveno Tenk: was a street mummer show
Mosseveno Tenk: orignally, the goat would demand gifts
Mosseveno Tenk: somehow this changed in the late 18th and early 19th century
Mosseveno Tenk: when the goat became the gift giver
Fauve Aeon: O.o
Fauve Aeon: nuuuu
Lady Sumoku: Now that is just wrong.
Mosseveno Tenk: i'll show you another antique postcard
Mosseveno Tenk: here the goat is bringing gifts, rather than scaring the kids
Joey: Extortion maybe?
Mosseveno Tenk: and the kids don't seem frightened of him anymore
Myrtil Igaly: ummmm
Joey: Kids got the goat on him
Elleon Bergamasco: perhaps he's wearing pajamas..
Mosseveno Tenk: the goat in the 20th century passed his name, as the giftgiver, onto their national versions of Santa Claus
Lady Sumoku: They seem surrounded by goats.
Mosseveno Tenk: Jultomte in Sweden
Joey: Probably mom and dad dressing up as goats
Mosseveno Tenk: julnisse in norway and denmark
Mosseveno Tenk: and joulupukki in finland
Jimmy Branagh: /me scribbles
Mosseveno Tenk: all which mean 'yule goat'
Mosseveno Tenk: well, that wraps my my series
Joey: Very nice history
Mosseveno Tenk: i believe i have covered ALL of the christmas characters
Fauve Aeon: YAY!
Mosseveno Tenk: yes, all of thme. that's right. i have
Darlingmonster Ember: YAY!
Ceejay Writer: Yule goat very far with your knowledge of holiday lore, sir.
Elleon Bergamasco: /me applauds
Mosseveno Tenk: /me waits for it....
Darlingmonster Ember: but...
Mosseveno Tenk: /me looks around
Myrtil Igaly: What about the Boiler Elf?
Dee Wells Dagger: Ummmm
Lady Sumoku: /me holds her breath.
Dee Wells Dagger: Yeah
Joey: Makes me hungry for a leg of lamb now
Jimmy Branagh: I missed the first two.  Glad I could make this one
Dr. Henry Jekyll: Hm. It seems I've missed the first two as well.
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: /me smiles
Joey: with the mint jelly
Lady Sumoku: /me turns slightly blue.
Darlingmonster Ember: Yes...the story of Boiler Elf, please
Magda Kamenev: What about the elves??
Mosseveno Tenk: what?
Mosseveno Tenk: what about the elves?
Timothy Sootworth: do we get presents?
Mosseveno Tenk: well, what about them?
Ceejay Writer: They previous transcripts should be at the website.
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Indeed they are.
Mosseveno Tenk: ah, i've been caught. I'm not done
Dee Wells Dagger: Yes, what about them? Come on
Mosseveno Tenk: there is one character i have been ignoring
Ceejay Writer: Oh really?
Mosseveno Tenk: and it stands before you like a gorilla in the room
Lady Sumoku: /me lets out her breath with a gasp.
Darlingmonster Ember: /me settles back
Dr. Henry Jekyll: Yourself?
Joey: Gorilla???? where???
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: /me coughs
Timothy Sootworth: grilla?
Wildstar Beaumont: Mr Biggins ?
Lady Sumoku: The Yule Gorilla.
Jimmy Branagh: Hmmmmm
Joey: lemme at em
Ceejay Writer: /me grins in satisfaction.
Lady Sumoku: Or Jebus.
Jimmy Branagh: The Christmas Tiger?
Mosseveno Tenk: ah ys, i've been avoiding this since 2007
Mosseveno Tenk: the elves. yes
Myrtil Igaly: Yay!!
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: /me raises an intrigued eyebrow and waits
Mosseveno Tenk: remeber i asked you to imagine western europe like a bowl, wtih a drain at the bottom located at Rome
Darlingmonster Ember: /me tries to do the math of Rome draining Europe
Mosseveno Tenk: and the bowl is filling up, romanizing, or christenizing, whichever way you want to look at it, the whole of europe, and flushing out the native cultures
Ceejay Writer: does that drain counter or clockwise?
Mosseveno Tenk: so wehn we looked for our christmas monsters, we looked at the fringes, like scandinavia
Mosseveno Tenk: and up in the mountains, like the alps and the pyrenees
Mosseveno Tenk: but
Mosseveno Tenk: there's one character that survived intact
Mosseveno Tenk: he was not tamed by nicholas, per se
Mosseveno Tenk: nor was he christenized
Mosseveno Tenk: and that is, the elves. the short elves.
Joey: The Abominable Snowman?
Lady Sumoku: The Danny Elf-man?
Dee Wells Dagger: The short bus elves?
Mosseveno Tenk: these characters are so overlooked, that if you walk into an otherkin forum portraying yourself as one, they will laugh you out, or think you are trying to make fun of them
Mosseveno Tenk: short bus elves, yes
Dee Wells Dagger: Good Lord
Mosseveno Tenk: you can google image their names if you don't believe me
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: /me snorts
Mosseveno Tenk: in finland, he is tontu
Mosseveno Tenk: in sweden, tomte
Jimmy Branagh: Ahhhhhhh
Mosseveno Tenk: norway and denmark have the nisse, in barns, in norway, and in attics, in the more urban denmark
Mosseveno Tenk: in scotland, the brownie
Mosseveno Tenk: in england, the hob
Mosseveno Tenk: in ireland, the old man that sleeps under the roof beam
Mosseveno Tenk: france has lutins living in the basement
Timothy Sootworth: thas a long name
Mosseveno Tenk: the dutch call them kabouter
Mosseveno Tenk: the germans were so intimate with them that some of their names were preserved,  like King Goldemar of Castel Hardenstein
Ceejay Writer: Sensing a Nightvalian theme
Myrtil Igaly: that's an elf?
Mosseveno Tenk: or Hödekin of Hidlesheim, who wore his hate down low on his eyes
Mosseveno Tenk: the germans called them gnomes or kobolds
Mosseveno Tenk: if they lived on a ship, they were called klaboutermann
Ceejay Writer: Kobolds I've heard of
Mosseveno Tenk: and in Cologne, the heinzelmann
Mosseveno Tenk: to which there is a monument to them this very day
Mosseveno Tenk: the colners were lazy folk, as the heinzelmanner did all the work
Mosseveno Tenk: until one day the bakers wife wanted to see what they looked like, and spread dried peas on the steps
Mosseveno Tenk: they triped on them, waking her,, and she took her lantern up to see
Mosseveno Tenk: and that was the last anyone ever saw of them. now people in cologne must do their own housework
Mosseveno Tenk: in the slavic east, they are the domovoi
Ceejay Writer: She vanished, but a lovely pot of split pea soup was found on the stove
Mosseveno Tenk: they were known to anglo saxons as the cofgodas, or king of hte room
Mosseveno Tenk: ancient rome had the lares which protected the hearth
Mosseveno Tenk: and back to greece, the more mischievious kobolos
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: The Lares, eh?
Joey: Wonders why Italy picked a witch to celebrate the holidays
Mosseveno Tenk: and i will make a strong arguement for the egyptian god Bes, as aslo one of us
Dee Wells Dagger: Wow
Mosseveno Tenk: yes, the lares. you will see them portrayed as miniature adults, as is towards the roman artistic ethic of beauty
Dee Wells Dagger: Intriguing
Ceejay Writer: Interesting notion! *scribbles*  I'd like to look at Bes in such light
Mosseveno Tenk: in all cases except rome, they are descripted as short, around 2 foot
Mosseveno Tenk: and very ugly
Mosseveno Tenk: these survived the onslaught of roman christianity
Dr. Henry Jekyll: Now... What do these creatures have to do with Christmas, then?
Joey: they were all made into a fruit cake?
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: /me chuckles
Mosseveno Tenk: but maybe not enitriely, for farmers would accuse their neighbors of harboring a brownie if they thought he was getting a little too prosperous, and complain to the priest
Ceejay Writer: brownies are pests
Mosseveno Tenk: and when the scandinavians came to america in teh mid 19th centuyr, the elves came with them
Mosseveno Tenk: now mr hyde asks how do we get from there to the north pole?
Stereo Nacht: Brownies are nummy! ;-)
Mosseveno Tenk: i'm glad you asked!
Mosseveno Tenk: watch it, nacht.....
Stereo Nacht: (Maybe not the same kind, mind you!)
Mosseveno Tenk: i'll bring out the nutcracker
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: /me chuckles
Mosseveno Tenk: now santa as we know him is approaching his 200th birthday
Dr. Henry Jekyll: Wha?
Ceejay Writer: Still looking very spry
Mosseveno Tenk: in 1822, he got assoicated with reindeeer, which pushed him north
Dr. Henry Jekyll: Oh no, not you too.
Mosseveno Tenk: 1822 being when 'the night before christmas' was published
Mosseveno Tenk: but the elves don't show up until 1850
Mosseveno Tenk: in a an unpublished poem or novel called the christmas elves
Dee Wells Dagger: He hadn't got around anti-slavery laws until then
Mosseveno Tenk: by lousia may alcott
Ceejay Writer: Practically a modern tale for New Babbage
Mosseveno Tenk: that was before 'little women'
Mosseveno Tenk: the next sighting was in 1857
Mosseveno Tenk: in Harper's Weekly
Mosseveno Tenk: wthe poem was called 'the wonders of santa claus' and it should google.
Mosseveno Tenk: let me set up some images
Mosseveno Tenk: if you look closely, you can see the first ever image of a christmas elf
Ceejay Writer: At the very top?
Mosseveno Tenk: from these harpers weekly images from 1857
Mosseveno Tenk: to quote
Mosseveno Tenk: In his house upon the top of a hill / And almost out of sight / He keeps a great many elves at work/ All working with all their might.
Dee Wells Dagger: Heartless old bugger
Mosseveno Tenk: i'll light up the pictures
Dee Wells Dagger: Where was the elf union?
Myrtil Igaly: he's kind of like old Popplefot and the elves are us urchins in the workhouse
Lady Sumoku: It's a Festivus miracle!
Fauve Aeon: aw, they are cute, look at the little hats...
Mosseveno Tenk: so they lived in an 'astonishing castle' on top a hill
Mosseveno Tenk: yes, the red hat, carried over from the traditional little people, who tended to dress in scarlet and grey
Mosseveno Tenk: the next elf sighting is in 1873, on the december issue of Godey's Lady's Book, which i dived into the archives and found for you after the ball last night
Dee Wells Dagger: Nicely preserved images
Mosseveno Tenk: complete with library stamp
Mosseveno Tenk: the first image of santa's workshop
Myrtil Igaly: Ooooh
Mosseveno Tenk: so the legend is growing
Darlingmonster Ember: :D
Ceejay Writer: So elves exist because of the social media of the day.
Myrtil Igaly: there's one stealing from his pocket
Mosseveno Tenk: a tales that takes on more detail every time it is told
Mosseveno Tenk: much fo the lore was told without words, by magazine illustrators
Darlingmonster Ember: nice
Dee Wells Dagger: Wow
Mosseveno Tenk: here in 1922, Norman Rockwell had a go at them
Dee Wells Dagger: Ah, yes
Mosseveno Tenk: and once norman rockwell paints you, you've gone into the canon, i would think
Lady Sumoku: /me nods.
Mosseveno Tenk: now notice this is all american work. surprising, eh?
Mosseveno Tenk: later in the century, in the coca cola ads
Dee Wells Dagger: Santa looks haggard
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Americans are sentimentalists.
Timothy Sootworth: ee looks drunk
Mosseveno Tenk: and into our own memories, by rankin bass christmas specials of 1962
Ceejay Writer: Our Santas elves are much newer than I ever realized.
Dr. Henry Jekyll: /me nods...
DJ Rock And Roll: Drunk? No, but deep into the final run-up to Christmas Eve, and working very hard!
Mosseveno Tenk: and i love the movie Elf, becuase they went to this image... suggesting that the pole changes with our memory of it
Jimmy Branagh: You'd look haggard too if you visited 5 billion chimneys
Jimmy Branagh: In 24 hrs.
Mosseveno Tenk: now i never noticed before, but hermie there has round ears. i dont' think he was really an elf
Timothy Sootworth: /me giggles
Dee Wells Dagger: The one drinking coke is smiling because of the main ingredient back then
Lady Sumoku: I'd be haggard after one.
Mosseveno Tenk: and that, i believe, is where the elves came from.
Magda Kamenev: /me cheers!
Darlingmonster Ember: woo hoo
Darlingmonster Ember: /me applauds
Mosseveno Tenk: which even i didn't know until last night. these little buggers are very hard to find information on
Stereo Nacht:  `*.¸.*´ APPLAUSE `*.¸.*´APPLAUSE `*.¸.*´
Myrtil Igaly: /me applauds
Elleon Bergamasco: /me cheers!
Dee Wells Dagger: Excellent
Jimmy Branagh: /me applauds
Wulfriðe Blitzen: /me Applauds
Lady Sumoku: Sneaky little things.
Darlingmonster Ember: /me applauds
Ceejay Writer: He know the true meaning of Coca
Max Islay: so the original santa was a drugged delusional man? :P
Dee Wells Dagger: Very well done, Mr Boiler Elf
Lady Sumoku: /me claps
Mosseveno Tenk: i encourage you to google image the names i said, and make your own mind up on whether my hypothesis is correct or not
Jimmy Branagh: Great presentation!
Elleon Bergamasco: Barvo!
Dr. Henry Jekyll: /me looks bemused, but applauds anyway.
Mosseveno Tenk: and for a craft, my entire collection of christmas and krampus postcards
Mosseveno Tenk: now, the end of the story i started last year
Ceejay Writer: Thank you, boiler elf. I learned a lot, and took some notes of avenues I want to explore more.
Myrtil Igaly: Yay!!
Mosseveno Tenk: how little kevin wanted to beleive , but could not
Mosseveno Tenk: becauyse the man in the back of the macy's store had a fake beard
Ceejay Writer: GAsp! Generous
Liza Veliz: aplauds
Mosseveno Tenk: and the only night his parents closed the bedroom door was on christmas eve
Mosseveno Tenk: and they didn't close it all the way, even then
Dee Wells Dagger: Kinky
Mosseveno Tenk: so one year, after finals were over, i followed someone into second life
Ceejay Writer: goodness.
Mosseveno Tenk: and i came off orientation island much as you see me now, but a bit taller
Dee Wells Dagger: 0.O
Darlingmonster Ember: o.O
Mosseveno Tenk: i gave myself 2 rules, which i will nto tell you, that my caused my personality to form
Magda Kamenev: Only a bit?
Ceejay Writer: he yam what he yam
Dee Wells Dagger: Was there a radiation leak?
Mosseveno Tenk: and i gave myself a quest
Mosseveno Tenk: yes, i was taller, buecase of the deformity that comes with getting this short. that took me a while to get used to
Lady Sumoku: What is your favorite color?
Mosseveno Tenk: clear
Dee Wells Dagger: -.-
Jimmy Branagh: /me chuckles
Darlingmonster Ember: I hope there is a calendar in this story....
Mosseveno Tenk: my quest, to make second life interesting
Mosseveno Tenk: was to find santa
Mosseveno Tenk: and i met many santas
Ceejay Writer: :)
Mosseveno Tenk: but they were kinda.. well
Dee Wells Dagger: And pick up some x ray goggles
Mosseveno Tenk: perverts
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: /me knows Duchess Highlands is not going to let go of that.
Darlingmonster Ember: gasp
Magda Kamenev: /me snorts.
Mosseveno Tenk: there was one named christmas mornignton that was probably the best of them
Lady Sumoku: Perverts in Second Live?
Mosseveno Tenk: but i wasn't satisfied
Lady Sumoku: *life
Mosseveno Tenk: because i knew, that the real santa would ask me to ride in his sleigh with him
Mosseveno Tenk: and one day, without prompting
Dr. Henry Jekyll: No relation to Victor Mornington?
Mosseveno Tenk: i got am IM from soeone i barely knew
Mosseveno Tenk: asking me to ride in the sleigh to peirmont landing
Mosseveno Tenk: that was before tenk was a mayor
Mosseveno Tenk: so
Timothy Sootworth: cor
Mosseveno Tenk: dreams do come true, eh?
Mosseveno Tenk: i get to ride the sleigh
Elleon Bergamasco: /me grins
Jimmy Branagh: /me applauds
Darlingmonster Ember: /me shivers with excitement
Mosseveno Tenk: and that's my story.
Darlingmonster Ember: /me applauds
Myrtil Igaly: They do!
Mosseveno Tenk: thank you.
Lady Sumoku: /me claps
Magda Kamenev: /me cheers again!
Timothy Sootworth: yay!
Magda Kamenev: .-'`'-. APPLAUSE APPLAUSE .-'`'-.
Stereo Nacht:  `*.¸.*´ APPLAUSE `*.¸.*´APPLAUSE `*.¸.*´
Myrtil Igaly: /me claps
Darlingmonster Ember: /me applauds
Jimmy Branagh: Thank you!
Liza Veliz: applauds
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: /me applauds
Mosseveno Tenk: /mbow
Ceejay Writer: oh wow - didn't know Piermont brought you in!
Wulfriðe Blitzen: /me claps and smiles
Dee Wells Dagger: And act as chief prosecutor
Jimmy Branagh: Great Salon!
Mosseveno Tenk: /mbow
Darlingmonster Ember: YAY!
Magda Kamenev: Thank you!
Mosseveno Tenk: no gestures, aye
Dr. Henry Jekyll: /me applauds without the use of gestures.
Joey: applauds
Mosseveno Tenk: tips will be going into the clockwork kraken meter
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: /me nods
Magda Kamenev: /me waves.
Ceejay Writer: Well done sir! This was so enjoyable. When I wasn't scared out of my socks
Lady Sumoku: Krakens need Giftmas too.
DJ Rock And Roll: /me applauds wildly
Joey: Got to run...but Merry Christmas to all
Myrtil Igaly: Thank you, I learnt a lot!
Mosseveno Tenk: i dont' like coca cola santa. he's creepy
Dee Wells Dagger: Yes, and high
Ceejay Writer: He's too fluffy.
Jimmy Branagh: Yeh 'ee's loike Popplefart
Timothy Sootworth: fanks mister
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: /me thinks he heard a capsule.
Dee Wells Dagger: Hehe Jimmy
Stereo Nacht: Good night Mr. Joey!
Jimmy Branagh: Oy dun loike Cloke neither
Mosseveno Tenk: that was a cool avatar joey had
Stereo Nacht: And good night Ms. Igaly!
Ceejay Writer: Merry Christmas, and/or whatever way you celebrate, and I must be off to finish writing a New Years legend, myself!
Myrtil Igaly: Good night Miss Stereo!
Dee Wells Dagger: Take care, those leaving :)
Liza Veliz: Thanks for good story adn history  telling
Jimmy Branagh: Merry Christmas, Mr. Boiler!  Merry Christmas everyone!
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Danke, Herr Boiler Elf, for another fascinating presentation.
Liza Veliz: Merry Chritmas
DJ Rock And Roll: I think the modern-day Grateful Dead wrote a song about the Coca-Cola Santa. "Driving that sleigh, high on cocaine, Santa Claus you'd better watch your speed.....", but their management team told them to change it to a song about Casey Jones.
Liza Veliz: christmas*
Mosseveno Tenk: ill be in town the rest the day if you need boiler elf to do anything
Stereo Nacht: Good night Mr. Michigan, Dr. Jekyll, Clockwinder, Mr. Branagh, Ms. Dagger, Ms. Kate, Ms. Writer, Ms. Ember, Ms. Sumoku, Ms. Bergamasco, Admiral Beaumont, Duchess Liz and everyone!
Stereo Nacht: /me curtsies
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Gute Nacht, those leaving.
Miss Kate: i always wondered what the aether salon was all about...  :)
Dr. Henry Jekyll: I myself have some business to attend to at the hospital. Thank you for the lecture, Mr. Boiler Elf.
Ceejay Writer: Good night Stereo!
Lady Sumoku: /me waves
DJ Rock And Roll: Good night to those leaving
Lady Sumoku: Merry that-mas!
Dr. Henry Jekyll: Good night, merry Christmas.
Jimmy Branagh: Noight awl!
Wulfriðe Blitzen: /me waves to those leaving
Myrtil Igaly: Good night everyone!
Wildstar Beaumont: good night everybody !
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Any more tips for our speaker?
Liz Wilner: goodnight everyone :)
Ceejay Writer: off with me!  Hope to see you all soon.
Darlingmonster Ember: /me smiles
Lady Sumoku: /me waves some more
Lady Sumoku: I think I've fed the Krakens enough for today.
Wulfriðe Blitzen: Photos of tonight's meeting will be appearing presently in the Flikr Aether group
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Heh.
Liz Wilner: /me waces to all...and relocates
Darlingmonster Ember: So glad I had time to come today.
Darlingmonster Ember: thank you all!!
Dee Wells Dagger: :)
Mosseveno Tenk: was that ok?
Dee Wells Dagger: It was excellent